Why Attitude Changes Everything

Pattie has invited us to write a post about why and how attitude has made a difference in our weight loss journeys. Here goes, Pattie...

This is certainly not my first thrill ride when it comes to losing weight. In fact, I've ridden the weight loss roller coaster ever since seventh grade. I still remember the day my dad first commented on my weight, which by then, had already crept up to 145 - the same number my P.E. teacher pronounced loudly enough for the entire class to hear when I stepped on the scale.

Ironically, the only place I felt comfortable during those years was at the local YMCA, where my athletic build wasn't out of place. In fact, I practically lived in a swimsuit, working as a life guard and swimming instructor all the way through high school.

I'm not sure what happened after college when I got married and birthed a baby, except that aerobic exercise of any kind fell completely off my radar. Whenever I needed to lose weight for a special event, I simply picked from the current menu of gimmick diets and practically starved myself back into a random size.

Looking back over the past 30 years, I realize that even when I got my weight back down to seventh-grade level, I still FELT FAT. Consequently, my thoughts always sounded like this: You look fat. Your thighs are huge. You don't even have a waist. You'll always be fat.

In response, my body simply manifested my thoughts. It worked hard to make me fat, to make my thighs large, to increase my waist size and to keep me overweight. Eventually, I reached a point last year when I finally threw in the towel and said, "What the heck? I'm fat and I know it. I might as well enjoy eating."

To get started, I took everything off my "prohibited foods list." I stuffed myself over and over, eating foods I had avoided most of my life - pizza, doughnuts, desserts, pastas, etc. As I packed on the pounds, I became more depressed and more miserable than ever...afraid I would never be able to stop the vicious cycle of destruction that consumed my waking moments and disturbed my sleep at night.

Somewhere toward the end of last year, I read Wayne Dyer's book, "Being in Balance." I was challenged by Dr. Dyer's assertion that I am not WHAT I eat so much as I am what I BELIEVE about what I eat.

Finally, on January 15, 2008, at home with the flu, I watched Oprah's show for the first time in my life. I heard Bob Greene describe what he termed "The BestLife." I cried as Oprah said loving yourself means honoring yourself and your own feelings first.

I agreed with Bob: "Losing weight is not that complicated. You simply have to eat fewer calories than you burn." But I also knew that logic alone would not get me off the killer coaster ride. I knew I had to change my thinking. I knew had to change my attitude. For that, I turned to Oprah's other buddy, Dr. Phil McGraw, and his book, "The Ultimate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom."

Having already signed the BestLife contract with myself, I worked through Dr. Phil's book like an alcoholic works the 12 steps. Six months later, I still keep the book within arm's reach at my desk because I've been at this weight before - although I'm in better physical condition than I've been in 30 years - and I don't want to slide back to where I started.

During the last six years, I've learned that the only way for me not to get drunk is never to take the first drink. I'm learning that the only way for me not to regain the 50 pounds I've lost is to monitor my eating and exercise habits as consciously as I avoid alcohol.

The difference this time is I'm no longer afraid. I'm willing to be honest with myself. I'm willing to step on the scale once a week. I'm willing to 'write what I bite.' I'm willing to maintain a no-fail environment. I'm willing to exercise regularly. I'm willing to be accountable to a support team.

Has my attitude changed? You bet. How has it changed? I'm no longer moaning over the past. I'm not anxious about the future. Today - right now - is what's important. And the right decisions I make right now are the ones that will add up to right thinking and right habits. And when it's all said and done, everything will be all right.

Resources:
Being In Balance: 9 Principles for Creating Habits to Match Your Desires

The Ultimate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom

Trippin' Out

Harldy anything is more fun than a grandchild's birthday party, usually. Especially when it's
the first birthday for
the first grandchild.

But when it came to driving 155 miles one way for the two-hour event, then turning around and driving 155 miles home so that I could pack and be ready to leave by 6 a.m. this morning to catch a flight and be gone for the next five days, things got complicated. At least they were complicated in my head.

After I had finally quieted the obsessive voice rattling off excuses not to go, I recognized the real reason I didn't want to make the trip was because I knew I would see a lot of folks I hadn't seen since my son's wedding in 2006...when I was 20 pounds lighter than I am right now. Simply put, I was projecting embarrassment. As if the party were about ME. How pitiful, I told that silly voice in my head.

So yep, I sucked it up. Threw some fruit, a protein bar and a bottle of water in the car and made the trip. The first thing my 25-year old son said was, "Dang, Mamma! You look GOOD!" After that, nothing else mattered. (And I politely passed on cake and ice cream.)

On the way home, sunshine warmed the spring afternoon temperatures to the mid-70s. I opened the moon roof, turned up the music and enjoyed beautiful memories of a few minutes with that precious one-year-old grandson all the way home!

P.S. I also put in a 35-minute aerobic workout at the gym before I left this morning!

The Numbers Game

"So, what size dress are you wearing these days?" asked my workout buddy, who has just returned from a three-week vacation in sunny California.

"Still in a 16," I answered, floundering in unexpected vulnerability.

"How did that happen?" she replied, innocently enough. Inside, though, it felt as if she had accused me of falling off the fitness wagon while she was away.

(Instantly, I remembered Dr. Phil's advice about internal dialogue and realized I am the only one who can let a friend's casual question create a toxic inner environment
for me. A convincing heap of evidence proving
I'm on the right track - 20 pounds and
17.75 inches lost since January 15 - barricaded the barrage of wrong thinking that had created
my uncomfortable moment in the first place.)

After a deep breath, I answered calmly, "It happened before I started the BestLife plan, when I had gotten too big for a 16.
I simply refused to buy any larger sizes. And although the 16's
are comfortably loose now, I'm not quite back into the 14's."

So keep comin' around, Cowgirls. We ain't even close to the end
of this trail.

Need help balancing your own numbers?
Read Moon's excellent post.

Need help with internal dialogue?
Read this 2 Book Set: The Ulitmate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom/The Ultimate Weight Solution Food Guide